PS：there must have some grammar mistakes or wrong expression, but I
still want to show my feelings in this way. Maybe one day, I will write
it in Chinese in another way:-D
I am fascinated by human ineptitude. I rarely see the world in terms of
good and evil, right or wrong; I think most people strive to do the
right thing. That the “right thing” is so often wrong is uncanny, some
times tragic, and often very, very funny. My favorite stories arise from
good-but-flawed characters trying desperately to do what each believes
is best for a given situation–and the situation keeps getting worse.
The characters don’t find any of this funny; we as the audience laugh
out of recognition–in their boat, we might do (and perhaps have done)
Today, I just want to watch a movie and this <Boyhood> comesinto
my mind. So maybe it is time for me to watch it and I watched it just
What interests me is our capacity to see this, yet make those same
mistakes regardless. It is funny that a species so capable — our
biology outpaces our circumstances such that the vast majority of us are
physically and intellectually far more agile than our daily work
requires — is so lost when it comes to emotions, to relationships with
one another. On the chain of evolution, from fish to ape to us, we are
the geek with glasses who can’t ask out the girl. Prior species were
wiped out from famine and disease; we might be the first to be felled by
Many people focused on the time, about more than 3 hours, and cannot be
patient enough to the end. Some complained that it is not dramatic at
all. But I think that this movie is all about our life and it crosses
the nationalities and the languages. Well, at least for me though I am
not that rock and roll, and my dad is a conservative person while my mom
is not a professor.
There is a moment in SAVING FACE when the daughter sees her mother’s
vulnerability for the first time. The mother has staunchly refused to go
on the blind date her daughter has procured. The daughter responds by
trying to railroad the mother into getting ready; she is certain the
situation can be fixed by getting Mom into right dress, the right hair.
The more the daughter tries to fix things, the worse it gets. What her
mother secretly wants is reassurance: She’s scared. The situation is
comic. Does the daughter care? Yes. Is she trying to do the right thing?
Certainly. Does it work? No. It is only when she throws up the hands and
surrenders, does the truth come out. And with it, the connection both
women have been subconsciously seeking.
The mother in this movie reminded me of my own mother. She is pretty,
intelligent and diligent, but meet the wrong husband when she was young
( Haha~ she is still young and pretty in my mind:-D). My mom and dad
were introduced by the elder people. When they began to have a date,
they always had a fight, not physical actually but in words and they
still decided to get married. I think that at that time, they still had
no idea about love and marriage and just listened to their parents. They
both are really nice and kind people, but obviously they are not the
right person to each other.
I wrote SAVING FACE as a love-letter to my mother. The character of Ma
begins the movie as a woman with all major decisions in life seemingly
made; at 48, she has lived a proper life and is now essentially just
living to die. That she ultimately breaks with tradition and lives on
her own terms is a triumph I wanted my mother– and the world — to see.
I suppose if there is one thing I am trying to say with the film, it is
that no matter who you are — Asian or black, gay or straight, young or
old — that everyone basically wants to love –and that love can start
at any point in your life that you want it to. I made SAVING FACE
because I wanted my mother to know that it was never too late to fall in
love for the first time, And that it is not by doing things right, but
by sometimes getting them wrong, that we launch the journey that allows
us to come into out own.
Then things were getting worse and worse after they built a family and
had me. And after went through many difficult things, they divorced when
I was in third grade in primary school. At that time, I just felt cool
and even talked to my classmates, because in my mind, it was a final
relief for my mom and dad and I know they still love me. I love reading
all kinds of books and articles and from one article from<Reader’s
Digest>, I read a story that an American journalist told his daughter
that although mom and dad divorced but we still love you. So I told
myself, so did my mom and dad~ haha~
After they divorced, I stay with my mom and we face many kinds of
things. Actually, most of the time, it is my mom that deal with all the
challenges. You can image a small town in china lived in a young and
beautiful women who just divorced with her husband, and now she had to
fight for life and protected her little girl. Rumors were horrible. For
example, if you had dinners with a bunch of people, others would have
said something bad about you, but it was just a normal dinner!
However,when I was at teenager period, I cannot understand all kinds of
things, though I read lots of books→_→ Just like the scene in the
movie, I complained and felt unhappy.
Some people loved my mom, but considering my against and resist, she
refused. Well, I was really selfish at that time.
When I entered high school, my mom had her second marriage. My mom
protected me very carefully and I never stay with my step-father alone.
Because I was in boarding school, I did not have to see him very often.
That was a relief for me. My step father was kind of person who was
vanity and good at disguising himself. What I mean is not that kind of
bad gay. It is just he loves drinking and has too many friends. My mom
suffered from all those stuff. What I memorized most is he was yelling
at my mom after he drunk at 3:00 am in the morning. Fortunately, he
never hit my mom and he did respect me and try to act as a nice dad in
front of me. And they also have sweet memories. It is just for me, I
think my mom deserve a better man.
Btw, my father also loves drinking and even throw things everywhere. He
was a strict man for me in primary school. He did not allow me to make
up myself even a hairpin or even bring beverage to school. Because of
this, he even hit me and my mom protected me. So she was the one hit by
my dad, very badly hit. Just once, my dad hit my mom. Ok~ but I still
love my dad, he has some good virtues and these years I finally
understand him. But I really dislike drinking and smoking.
During these years, my mom raised me up by herself and almost cover all
the cost. She never counted on anyone and never complain a lot even when
so-called best friend did something bad to her. She is still pretty and
continue studying after go through many difficulties. She is an
Now it is my final year at undergraduate stage. How time flee.
Thanks for the movie, I feel more understand my mom and the life we are
I just have one question for the movie: why the mom in the movie always
marry the wrong guys especially she was a professor in psychology?
Because after I read some books about psychology, I helped my mom to
figure out her problem in marriage and she seems to meet a real right
Why some really good people always meet the wrong guys? I do not know.
But I do believe that it is just a process to select the right person.
Some comes too early; some comes too late. But eventually he/she
will come. Also, marriage needs compromise. If no one want to say sorry
first and always think what I say is right, even the right person cannot
help you~ Haha~
My dad never compromise, so dose my mom. Or maybe they just did not meet
the right person who they are willing to make a compromise. Or they just
cannot find each other’s real beauty.
So this is all about life. A true life.
What we can do is just enjoy the moment.
Try to find someone who really know and think how good you are.
It is not we create the moments; the moments seize us.
Written by Sophie LU
This movie is really a gift to me:-D